Noelle Hancock
Noelle Hancock
Recent Stories
Graduation advice from an old friend: don't use your liver, find the buffet
Earlier this week, the scene editors asked me to write a piece about Commencement, so that the graduating seniors would know what to expect next month. They mentioned my journalistic excellence, my gift of wit, my overall brilliance, and something...
This is my last column. Ever. :-(
My very last column. Ever. :-( I've published numerous columns over the years. There were the "50 Most Annoying Things" columns (Number 51. When a celebrity marries a "normal" person and it's not you.) There were the columns in which I told...
Just tell me your son got my job
Many of you have made inquiries regarding my post-graduation plans. Perhaps this is for stalking purposes. Understandable. Or perhaps you're curious as to who'd actually offer me employment, so you'll know which publications to steer clear of in the...
The wuss factor: a diagnostic self-exam
Welcome to Wussville. Population: You! Yale prides itself on offering its students one of the best liberal arts educations in the world -- and by offer, I mean in exchange for 35 Gs a year. Yet we students do not escape the trappings of the ivory...
'Fun lovin' always seems to have its consequences
Every time finals week rolls around, I'm repeatedly left wondering why I accepted admission to this school -- or why I chose to attend college at all. This week is a hellish time. I typically consume enough caffeine to power my flight back home, and...
Noelle Hancock called -- she wants her pants back!
I'll be the first to claim that the majority of the Yale population would like to get into my pants. But stealing them from the gym while I was running was taking things a bit too far. Although I'd been told before that I could charm the pants off...
50 Most Annoying Things. Ever.
50) Internet porn pop-up windows (so I've heard--). 49) When you walk into a bathroom that completely reeks, only to have someone come in directly after you who thinks that you're the cause of it. 48) The expression: "It's a small world!"...
Reality bites for seniors, well, maybe just for me
Recently I decided not to attend graduate school next year. This decision rests predominantly on the fact that the admissions deadline for the one school that I wanted to attend has already passed. Oops. After much deliberation, I decided that mailing...
Will I still be unemployed ...When I'm sixty-four?
I'm old, y'all. It must have happened when I wasn't looking. Sometime in this car ride of life when I took my eyes off the road just for a second -- probably to look at the hot guy in the next car over -- everything changed. And when I started paying...
Class of 2005, it sucks for you!
So it seems that this year's Exotic Erotic dance has gone the way of the Long Wharf Mall and Wednesday nights at Risk. So I decided to step on in and give my account of last year's "the more risque the less you pay" event. This is for all you freshmen...